What’s one positive trait you’ve gained because of BPD?
Last Updated: 30.06.2025 08:22
He’d bring us out ,and we would form the position .
So whats the point in blame.
Although we always gave her a kiss on the cheek. She would shrink away from it!
What are some prime examples of gibberish from the bible?
I suffer greatly, because of BPD..
One cannot hold on to bitterness.
Mine was extreme ,and lasted 19 years
Like some twisted love , they where addicted to each other
I don,t even have a pension.
I let him have the joy of his friends( that i would never know myself.!)
Trauma never leaves you! Its actually lives in the fashia ,of the body .The connective tissue.
One of his many names for me was Runt .He like that it rhymed with (well you know)
But my sister and my other 3 brothers wouldn’t have come near him every again!
Nintendo has replaced the longtime voice of Peach and Toad - Polygon
He was dying to do it , i knew.
But it has taught me many things other people will , never know!
He had many friends, who didn,t know the home devil he was, for his sake ,i never enlighted them either.
Chime Gets a Ringing Endorsement on Wall Street as IPO Valuation Hits $11.6B - PYMNTS.com
And when you live in a life , of being terrified, and shocked, and permantly stressed; especially as a child born in to all this .
She died young (from the stress and abuse of Big T Trauma) of liver cancer!
But im a psyci anyway, and i read energy and people, .
MAHA kids’ health report misinforms about tonsillectomies and ear tubes - statnews.com
My only sister also couldn,t make her life work.
The only way to get rid of it forgood ,is sommence therapy,
The coal was sharp, and i usually had no underware! So my bare arse ,was cut and rossened on the coal..
Retinal prosthesis woven from tellurium nanowires partially restores vision in blind mice - Phys.org
As is all addictions, people can’t leave off.
But he said ,he was sick of her anyway ,and only put up with her as i had a friend ,and seemed to be happy.
That life, was meant to be , as the world teaches us great lessons, and leaves us many gifts.
Yes, a stroke or heart attack is the reason on your death certificate.
A line in front of him, from the eldest to the youngest.
Its mostly always from childhood abuse .
Scientists May Have Just Discovered the First Ever Pieces of Mercury - The Daily Galaxy
I only knew my twisted world , and there, is no choice for a child but to live in it. Or Die in it!
And if you hold on to hate you only die inside yourself,!
Youll pack your bags and leave Dorset.
Put me off passion for life!!
I never cut or harmed myself..
He’d sit me down, and stand behind the chair, Then he’d make a great show of his beauty (the chesil )and place it behind my neck ,at the base!
Feeling antsy in your legs at bedtime? This condition may be to blame - CNN
I had offered the whole expense of the holiday to her, free.
Ther’s very good reasons why i was left alone.
I do have abandomment issues but they come from being left alone ,without my mum, or any of my family in a incubator for 4 months.
Win a signed pink cycling jersey of Giro winner Simon Yates - Team Visma
As she had lost her son ,to fatty liver disease!
You don’ t get a state one here , in England ? until your at least 67 yrs old ! Im 63.
Trauma lives in the body, as ive explained, but it actually this that kills you in the end.
Dazzling Royal Diamonds and Pearls to Celebrate Trooping the Colour in London - The Court Jeweller
Because huge Trauma like mine is alive.
I immediatly know and see what their chidhood was. I tell them you had a awful time in childhood.
It was going to be , some day.
What will help me to get a bigger butt naturally?
Those are used to try and block the pain, like that of my life out..
Also my liver and lungs are fatally diseased!
Why ? because Trauma depletes the immune system.you get terribley ill , with chronic disease from all the horror ,and stress of it.
I want to be a well-rounded person. What should I do?
Even in the coal hole, i said the lines in my head..
Her first husband, had been a gay man ,and he was a lovely person.
He call us down, from where ever he stashed each one of us ,that day ! We were kept seperate.!
Its like, taking poison, and hoping the other person will die.
She was in good health!
It will be my last birthday ,as im dying of a brain tumor and 8 other autoimune diseases.
For him, I cleaned and cooked and shopped, and spent the whole day, doing a weeks work) in the only day off, i had, besides Sunday.)
I of course replied” arh beautiful!
We could never speak unless he spoke to us!
I worked then as a chef ,and a very good one.
I was writing from the time i was a small child.
I did write a poem about him though, and my mum.
I am a twin , my twin is a boy called Alan. I had a sister and 2 other brothers
But im dying ,and its too late for me.
My family never makes their pension either.
She said her life with him ,was love, and spoke to me of all the passion, it had brought her.
And as runt ,of the litter .Which of course, i actually was!
And don,t forget my 4 months alone, in the incubator. Knowing my brother in the womb and my mother voice .The baby knows she’s alone!
Then he’ d take out his beloved lump hammer ,show it to the kids.
She wouldn,t have been !
I was 9 years of age.
And i know him well ,and every thing about him. This relationship, is the only real one iIve been able to keep!
She found it foreign!.
I said to her
We were all going out this night to a fancy resteraunt.
She married twice! .
So, i spoilt her more .
I was very sick at this time too.
He knew the spot.
And who doesn’t know suffering?
I only stopped writing poetry recently, because , of my brain tumor
As i do to all so called friends.?
Thats being isolated in a house, locked up as a child .We never saw any people except in School and we had no relatives in Liverpool!
My mother wasn’t a tactile women ..only as babes could she touch us. After we grew ,she couldn,t touch any of us.
I couldn’t, believe it.
Due to the real legacy of trauma (B.P.D)
What did i know ?
He resisted the act ,that day.
We were not on the streets..
Anyway, i told my husband ,and he was gobsmacked.
We didn’t no it wasn;t normal life..we were isolated, and taken from Dublin in Ireland ,where our whole mothers family lived , to Liverpool in England!
She was deluded, and thought she could stay on for the reminder of the holiday!
Stress hormones Adrenaline and Cortosol ,would have flooded my brain, and they never left it!!!!
Why do we forgive? Because if we don,t
I might have to go back 30 generations or more..
My dad was a alcholic psychopath, and violent in the extreme.
But ive been too sick for many years..
Would this be the day?
They are buried together, in the same grave..
He said i’d end up like her, and he laughed his big rolicking bear of a laugh!
She loved him until the end.
So i became my fathers slave and he hated me the most.
5 of us kids, and it wasn’t a big house.
I know ,a lot about trauma.
I had hoped to write a book about this .
Thats was my nicest nick name for him
One was a lump hammer, another was a iron chisel.
Your thinking ,but those kids would have been street wise?
The same beautiful brown eyes my mother loved so much!
They look at me amazed ,and ask me how i could possibly know it?
But im an empath, and i help lots of people.
19 years ,i spent with dear old papa.
The only rule us 5 kids had .
This is how, and why children get BPD.
She died at 55 of colon cancer.
She got all dolled up, but it looked as she was dressed up to play the part of , Florence Nightingale ,as she descended down the cottage stairs ,like a Queen.
One women pretended to my husband she wanted to see me for coffee ,and make friends.
Because , i didnt have the heart to hurt my friend.!.
I forgave my father, and i took care of him ,until his death in 1999..my mum left us on the 29th Jan 1998.
We born here on earth , for the soul to learn , the contrast, of heaven.
My familys so full of ancestral BIG T Trauma.
All the time i was locked up.
I watched his eyes light up and his twisted smile rejoice, in his joy of it all.
We all went to grammer schools
My life is so biszare .
My mum and dad in the seventies!
I was the most vunerable of my siblings. I was born small ,and was sickly ,and of course none of us could ever thrive!
Especially a lifetime of it.
One cannot live in the past .
On the 31st of Jan this month .
The apprentership one gets in Extreme Big T Trauma childhood is insight and extreme awarness.
I forgave my father,, and in those years i cleaned and looked after him .
But i am married 43 years to my husband this July !
Im dying but, im not bitter.
She was a women, a mother with her own children!.
And i lived it daily.
I ended up cooking for her, and bringing her eveywhere with us.
But, we were locked up after school.
I waited trembling.
As i gave and gave ,everything to people, they began to use me.
With Catholic nuns and Church on Sundays.
I got to know the terrible awful childhood, he had himself. And his Jolly Pub Persona.
When she asked me how she looked .
When he wanted one of his lessons to be taught!
I was scared of men, in general
Im kind ,and give many things, inc money ,to any of persons in need. I have a groups of homeless beggars ..i help out daily. They all know me by name!
But people really die of the Big T Trauma!!
Ive learnt so much.
And, all my friends down the years ,where users.
Comes on , in middle age.
Was to survive, this bastard.
I will be 64.
Insight, and i can spot a wrongin from 3 miles away.
My place (mostly )was the coal hole..it was a small room heaped with coal .
I have no regrets .
Where the ultimate outsiders.
I did it because my mum asked me too!
And as she herself ,wasn’t kissed or touched as a child.
Do all the shopping, and cooking and look after all the dogs.
I wasn’t taught any boundries, our home ,was like any war zone , and Dad told us, he had bodies buried, under the floor boards.
As i said though i will be 64 on my last birthday!
Its a big thing in the States for the last 25 years.
He was a brick layer (when he worked at all) and he carried his tools around ,hanging from a money belt.
She stayed with him because she thought he,d grow out of it. He didn’t of course!
I write beautiful poetry .
.I left my 2 sons and my husband to do it. Instead of spending the day with them
At this time i had honed my heart to the same, as that of a lion and i knew i wouldn’t beg or cry ,nor plead.
It comes from Big T Trauma and is no fault of anyone who has it.
(And it was in our own minds.)
His abuse (his own) began at 2 years of age. His mothers friend, sexually abused him, from the age of 2.
I had many talking therapys , but they just don,t work.
But i went to school ,and was locked up evey evening , until he was off out on a bender..then mum would set us free, and we,d be bouncing off the walls,
Who then, do I blame.?
His mum and dad ,were Alcoholics!
Rather to engertic for me ,with my terrible health, but i was left to run the house, it was a Cottage in Dorset.
Im constanly in a state of FLIGHT or FIGHT my whole life
Anyway ,i could never hold on to a relationship.
My twin will have involuntary pissed himself, but not me at least not, that day!
I could never make a relationship work though!
Although he,d calmed down a bit ..he still shouted his orders at me and thought , my older sister would be better at the job..
I was grabbed out of my mother hung upside down, and rushed up to the prenatal ward, to spend 4 mths alone, with, only medical staff.
Why did i forgive my father ?
He did pay me though, i made him (.After i’d trudged miles to get his pension ) Before ,it all was gone, over the pubs counter!
And ive living now since 2005, on disablement .(Which is a pittance)
He took out the hammer, and explained again, how the smallest tap ,of this hammer would kill me in a second.
Being very nice and never wanting to say the wrong thing.
BPD only comes to a person who has suffered childhood trauma.
Another so called friend had bit the dust..
He weighed in at 5 lbs .I was the second born, and i weighed 3 and a half pounds.
Took her away on holiday ,with us, my 2 pugs her dog, a Jack Russell.
This is soul school!.
As his daughter ,he didn’t even think I wouldn,t do it. (Look after him)
I think the readers, may guess!
Everytime, i saw a chronically ill person in middle years.
He said i reminded him of an old aunt ,who used to beat him, and when the menapause came, she was placed in a mental home and never was released ,until she died.
Then later on when my husband had gone to the bar..she started telling me, that they where having a affair, and that he loved her much more then me ,and other loads of visious lies.
But it wasn’t much.
He isn,t a very sexual person at the best of times!
I was seconnd youngest,
So he went home with my mum to her 2 other children.
Im still living with it.
But there where , these other acts only us 2 girls, would receive, (When id have rather had his lump hammer , and chisel.).
We wern’t close any more, the family fractured, after my Mothers death, and seeing me annoyed them ,as i was the familys scapegoat..
Im a true spealist, because i study it for years .And i still do..
You’d think that being brought up for so long, in those terrible circumsatances ,i would know the ways of people ,and the world, but i wasn,t in , nor of the world .